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East Bay Counseling Choices

East Bay
Counseling Choices

(877) 525-6678
(510) 525-6678

Serving Berkeley, Oakland, Alameda, Walnut Creek, Lafayette, Castro Valley and other SF East Bay locations

Communication Skills, Assertiveness and Low Self Esteem

Communication Skills

Relationships are part of almost every area of life family, friends, work and therefore, communication skills are fundamental to our happiness. A basic principle of skillful communication is to express our point of view without blaming, judging or name calling. A non-aggressive framing of our point of view enables our partner to "hear" or understand what we are saying. Professional counselors are experts in communication skills. Therapy provides an excellent place to improve communication skills and help you understand feelings and attitudes that may be hindering authentic communication.


Assertiveness is an attitude of respect for yourself and others that allows you to act in your own interest and at the same time have due regard for others. To be assertive is to express feelings and needs honestly and comfortably without intimidation or bullying.

A lack of assertiveness may stem from many sources including not feeling on an equal footing with others and so not deserving fair and equal treatment, fear of possible conflict, and concern that you will be judged or disliked.

Therapy helps you identify the barriers to respectful and assertive interaction and provides a safe context to learn how to relate more assertively with the people in your life.

Low Self Esteem

Self-esteem refers to our feeling of personal worth and social adequacy and often stems from our earliest experiences. When we feel good about ourselves, we are able to reasonably trust others, take realistic risks, and keep trying to reach our goals when there are obstacles in the way. When we don't feel good about ourselves, we may find ourselves passing up opportunities and not taking care of ourselves.

Improvements in self-esteem involve being able to accurately assess one's positive attributes as well as perceived deficiencies. There is an appreciation of oneself as unique, rather than better than others. There is an understanding that beating oneself up and feeling less worthy than others is a distortion of reality.

A major benefit of psychotherapy is the restoration of self-esteem for individuals who have lost confidence in themselves.